I read the “The Moment of Lift” by Melinda Gates – the wife of Bill Gates. She advocates for the development principal that investment in women has a multiplying effect that will increases global living standards. Some of the take ways were
- Female Education Role models
- What a benchmark it was for me that both my parents were well over educated.
- Unpaid work
- Gates laments that women’s powerful impact on the quality of life is deterred because much of their work is not paid. I extrapolated this to the notion that the caregiver should be paid by their spouse for their time giving care. That is an important principal to test in my marriage. Directly depositing a salary into a caregivers account to release them from the traditionally unequal and gendered expectation that they would do it for free. This is more than just sharing an account, paying someone directly to a personal account for their care giving gives them the opportunity to use their wages to leave yo’ ass. Having a shared account doesn’t give them that freedom. I think a health relationship needs both sides to be independently choose to remain in the relationship each day. Care givers remain dependent if they are not paid wages for their care. A radical idea, but why not is 1983 we can do anything!
- Partnership vs. Dominance
- Gates mentions that male society is about dominance, but to be successful a man who is an ally to women and god let us pray that is what a husband is, would need to mature into having a partnership mindset. This topic struck me, because I have always seen my independent spirit as a virtue, but than reflected that my spirit is a reaction to dominance and preservation of my own dominance over myself! This inspired contemplation on the deeper id-like motivations underlying my sunny outward personality.